Joy is a choice....

I read this phrase today on a chalkboard in someone's kitchen and it got me thinking about the week that has just been. It was my first week back at work after a brilliant period of maternity leave. It was one of the hardest weeks I have ever experienced. This week has been punctuated with tears, panic attacks, a parking ticket and swearing.  Not great but I got through it. Being joyful has not been on my list as I have battled through the week feeling frustrated that certain parts of life are not how I want them to be.

The thing is, the things that I would like to be different are not going to happen in the near future so do I carry on being miserable or do I choose to be joyful. I choose joy.

I do not expect this to be the easiest route but I do know that I don't want to wallow in self pity, sounding like a broken record on repeat as I constantly moan. It's boring for everyone around me, boring for me and completely unhealthy. So I am going to endeavour to find the joy in my situation and be more thankful for it. Having considered this point, here are some of the things I am thankful for...

• I have a job that allows me to pay the bills, live in a comfortable home, eat 3 meals a day and have the occasional treat. The current economic climate means that so many are not able to make ends meet so I must find the joy in the fact that we have enough money to live well.

• I work part time. I am fortunate that I can earn as much as I need on part time hours which means I get to spend more time with my family and friends.

• The joy on my daughter's face when I get home from work. This is a reward like no other.

• I work with some cracking people. It makes the time at work a bit easier.

• Being back at work has helped me to feel like I am moving towards that place I want to be (in a 'forever' family home and finacial comfortable).

I know that I will not always remember these things. I know that I will still find going to work hard, that I will still cry about it, that the panic attacks will come again but I am going to try and be more joyful.

I choose joy.